the Right Angler
Now, I didn’t find happiness alone. No, I had a little help from two very wise, very old friends who were kind enough to point me in the right direction.
St. Paul
Perhaps you’ve heard of St. Paul. Not the city, of course, but the Apostle of Christ it's named after. He was also known as Paul of Tarsus. He spent the first half of his adult life persecuting followers of Christ, and then, after a rather startling revelation, the second half spreading Christ’s message throughout the known world. His 14 letters (epistles) make up a good portion of the New Testament of the Bible.
Now, two thousand years later, whether you are a follower of Christ or not, the wisdom in these letters remains profound and true and can lead you to happiness. He wrote: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things."
Sometimes I think that we give too much attention to the base, dark and dreary. Just check out the evening news, look at a magazine cover, or watch television and you’ll see what I mean: murder, rape, corruption, adultery, celebrity worship and scandal. We’ve become addicted and desensitized to the immoral, salacious and superficial. We‘ve given these evils a place in our hearts and minds.
We can’t forgot that this world we live in, this country that we call home is a beautiful place and the people that surround us are for the most part good people with love in their hearts. Our communities are full of talented, charitable people leading fruitful, moral and productive lives. St. Paul asks us to focus our thoughts on the truths not the lies, the pure not the stained, the honorable not the corrupt. He wants us to celebrate the lovely, gracious, and excellent, to set our hearts and minds on these things.
Doing this put me on the path to happiness.
Socrates
I’m going to assume that everyone knows who Socrates was. I recommend reading him if you haven’t lately. He was a wise man and his critical thought passes the test of time. Socrates provides some insight into happiness with this quote: “He is the richest who is content with the least.”
Now, money is wonderful. It enables all of us to be free and independent and provide our families with food, shelter and the creature comforts. There is nothing inherently wrong with earning or spending money. There is nothing wrong with buying nice things, but it is important to recognize that money and the stuff it buys can not provide real happiness, and if you are looking for happiness in the mall, you won't find it. Sure a nice house, fancy cars and technological gadgets can provide a quick fix, but this happiness is only temporary and fleeting and just makes us crave newer, better and more.
It's so easy to fall into the trap though and start believing that stuff can make us happy. We work so hard to give ourselves and our families all that money can buy. We want more and more stuff and then become depressed and confused when it isn't enough, when it doesn't bring happiness.
Socrates understood that chasing money and the stuff it buys does not make you happy but wanting less just might.
Todd Carges
So I had a little help from St. Paul and Socrates, two very wise men, but I must admit that their advice alone did not bring me happiness. It pointed me in the right direction but failed to get me there. You see, when it comes to finding happiness, the advice of others can only take you so far. In the end, you have to figure it out for yourself, and I did 8 years ago when I married my beautiful wife, Nicole.
Yes. I found real, lasting happiness by marrying the right woman. It's the best decision I've made and the only real success I've had. I get to share my hope and dreams, my faith, my family, and all that this world has to offer with Nicole, and that makes me happy.
So, my advice, if you want to be truly happy, marry the right person. It's as simple as that.
Conclusion
There you have it. Advice from three wise men: St. Paul, arguably the most influential Christian scholar, Socrates, arguably the most influential Greek Philosopher, and Todd Carges, arguably the least influential writer at the Free Press. Now, before I wrote this column, I did consider that both St. Paul and Socrates were put to death for sharing such wisdom, but I decided that your happiness was worth the risk. Keep in mind, however, that advice can only take you so far. Ultimately, only you can find your own happiness. God bless you, good luck and Merry Christmas.